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Quote1 Ach dulierderhosen! All I know is that I need to get to bed! I could sleep till Marble publishes a trade paperback of street poet Ray! Quote2
Nutcracker[src]

History

The mutie initially known as Nightboomfer or Night-boomfer[3] was not among the extended team of X-Persons when they attacked the superheroes known as Revengers thinking that the Revengers were mindcontrolled by a villain. However, as the battle escalated and other super-hero teams joined, Night-boomfer also appeared there, aggressively boomfing just in front of Clunk and Dagnabbit. The battle went on well after there was no reason to fight, up until the artist had a stroke.[4]

Nightboomfer joined the X-Persons later, but he failed to become a gritty, more commercial character. Eventually, Nightboomfer started to have merciless, malevolent motivations and, at the same time, an increase in his power levels, but was unable to understand what this meant.[3]

During the "Mutant Beach Party!" Saga, the X-People were being harassed by the ominous consortium of their most deadly and most implacable enemies,[3] a gathering of non-mutie super-heroes who were jealous of the commercial success of comic-book series featuring muties.[5] Afraid of the consortium, the muties—including Nightboomfer—and their allies—such as the non-mutie Captain British—hid at a beach house to regroup and plan—or more probably to have angst-filled conversations—after saving the world thrice since breakfast—which is the first meal of the day.—[3] The consortium planned to send several evil teams to attack the X-People, weakening the muties before attacking themselves.[5] The first of this team was the Fraternity of Honked-off Muties, renamed the Justice Junta, a team of eight evil muties who claimed to want their comic-book series. Nightboomfer boomfed them all away, saving the team, and boomfed back alone. Fizzler of the X-Persons asked him for an explanation, as he should have overloaded his boomf; and Nightboomfer told them all about his increased powers and unexplained evil hunger. Rogue of the muties, gasping, reasoned that he was becoming Dark Night-boomfer, a piece of news that Nightboomfer and Woof'a'eam received with glee.[3]

Leaving the house, the X-People were attacked by other villains and finally met the Living Humongous Menhir, a villain who threw them all from the top of a cliff claiming that this would increase even more the sales.[3] Non-Entity of the Mutie Wanna-Bes fell below his partners and was crushed and killed under their weight, but at the same time he saved them all. However, some muties including Sturm-and-Drang believed that they had been killed and were in a simulation of live that should lead them to Australia. Some muties left with her, but Nightboomfer was not among them. Nightboomfer probably stayed with the muties in several important battles, including opposing the Four Horseman, Made of Ol'Paper Clips and the ablutionary war staged by the High Ablutionary.[5]

The Australia-based team came back to join the team, claiming that the Over-goddess Ragu told them that they should oppose the consortium. The most vocal opponent to the I'm-dead movement, Dusk Kitten, decided to schism and create her own team, X-Pialidocious to have swashbuckling funny adventures as opposed to the gloomy attitude of their ex-partners. She decided to move to England because it was far from Australia. Nightboomfer joined without explaining his reasons, as opposed to Captain British and Kloenix II, who specified their motivations; Beggin' appeared from nowhere and she simply posed for the picture but she remained with the team. Dusk Kitten staged that they should have their premiere in a crossover with the "Mutant Beach Party!" Saga as a way to upset their ex-partners. They did not move immediately; X-Pialidocious stayed with the muties for the upcoming battle. Nightboomfer and Captain British, along with most of the muties, were at the beach when the Watchit appeared hovering over them as an omen of the hard times, and immediately after that the muties prepared for the final confrontation with the consortium. The consortium charged against the muties,[5] but apparently no-one important died that day (Already-counted Non-Entity seems to have been the only named casualty).[6]

While supposedly based in England, Nightboomfer, now using the new nom-de-guerre Blight-Crawler, tried to spend a night at Hotel Galacticus, New Hampshire, but bouncer Ben Grime, believing Blight-Crawler to be a pet, refused to let him in.[1]

Finally moving to a lighthouse in England, Nightboomfer changed his alias to Nutcracker and X-Pialidocious changed its name to Ecchscalibur. Bony Stark, superhero and tycoon, became the owner of the rights of the team, and made money by producing action figures of the main five characters of the team; newest members, including Gidget, K-Lion and Midget were not considered for this. However, Stark wanted to make more different figures; and to do so, he needed variations over the characters. Stark manipulated events so that Ecchscaliburs from alternate dimensions appeared in the adventures of Ecchscalibur.[7]

Unaware of this, although having already found some of these alternate dopplegangers, Ecchscalibur continued with their usual activities: Fighting quanty enemies like the geeky Treknet, making references to British cultures and speaking with bad English accents so that they can still be considered the British mutant team—albeit many of them, including Nutcracker, were not British; and others were not mutants. Coming home and eager for a rest, Ecchscalibur was assaulted by the Nazi-Ecchscalibur. The Russian Cossack Ecchscalibur joined the fray, and immediately the Maoist Collective Ecchscalibur appeared. Eventually, the three alternate Ecchscaliburs fought each other while Nutcracker and his friends sneaked away.[7]

However, entering home, Nutcracker discovered that his room had been seized by the Holistic Tofu Ecchscalibur, and his partners found other Ecchscaliburs in their room. Ecchscalibur left the lighthouse, but the situation outside was even worse: Fat Ecchscalibur, Tall Ecchscalibur, Hillbilly Ecchscalibur, Neo-Freudian Ecchscalibur, Chunky Ecchscalibur, Creamy Ecchscalibur, Instant Freeze-Dried Ecchscalibur and Insider-Trading Ecchscalibur were in the vicinity. Nutcracker and his friends, aghast, ran away, but were stopped by Stark. Questioned by Ecchscalibur, Stark explained the reason for the other Ecchscaliburs' presence: He wanted money by making toys of them.[7]

Attributes

Powers

Teleportation: Nightboomfer can teleport (or "boomf") himself, taking other people with him even against their will. The amount of people he can boomf at once is limited to less than eight, unless Nightboomfer had experienced an upsurge in his power.[3] Nutcracker can aggressively boomf in front of people, scaring the heck out of them.[4]

S-Factor: As a mutie, Nutcracker has the S-Factor in his ADN that boosts the commercial success of comic-book series featuring him.[3]

Wallcrawling:Nightboomfer can also crawl through wall, including the borders of the panels.[5]

Abilities

He speaks German.[7]

Weaknesses

When boomfing, he causes a foul smell and a cloud of colored smoke.[3]

Paraphernalia

Transportation

Boomf![3]

See Also

Links and References

References

  1. 1.0 1.1 Hotel Galacticus in What The--?! #9
  2. Merry Mutant Melodies in What The--?! #6
  3. 3.0 3.1 3.2 3.3 3.4 3.5 3.6 3.7 3.8 3.9 Mutant Beach Party! in What The--?! #3
  4. 4.0 4.1 When Titans Bunch! in What The--?! #1
  5. 5.0 5.1 5.2 5.3 5.4 Mutant Beach Party! Part 2 in What The--?! #4
  6. The events are not referenced again, no character seems to have died or suffered permanent injury.
  7. 7.0 7.1 7.2 7.3 To save me, why must I kill me? in What The--?! Winter Special #1
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