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Quote1 You're a geneticist. You're telling me you believe in some bearded guy standing on a cloud? Quote2
Spider-Man[src]

In many of Earth's monotheistic religions (Judaism, Christianity, Islam),[24] Yahweh has been viewed as the supreme being, creator of all things, and only God.

History

Origin

Yahweh was one of the gods[1] of Earth,[24] but his true origin varies from one account to another. Yahweh was part of a group of life-forms that existed before the Multiverse, and who were the only sentient life at that point.[3]

Creation of the Universe

Yahweh allegedly created Earth-616 and all its multiple realities, including Duckworld, along with other universes (and the laws of physics), and that his job was "a contribution to a collective work called "Existence". Such universes were created for various reasons: Aesthetic expression, intellectual exercise, entertainment value, and money. This creation was a contract of UR&D (Universe Research and Development) supplier (God described his work as being "a supplier" rather than a creator), and legally speaking he wasn't the universe's creator.

Yahweh had a lot of trouble validating his universe to the committee. While they loved the pitch, including its multi-layered concept, both budget and intelligent life were problematic (as they were the only sentient life-forms at the time). Yahweh tried to settle for limited brain capacity, but eventually had to create Death (in order to prevent competition between them and the new life-forms). To negate that, Yahweh decided to add evolution in hiding, causing the life spans of those new life-forms to extend through science (and causing later the committee to try to destroy Earth with asteroids), and the Afterlife. This Multiverse became highly lucrative as a tourist destination, ensuring its existence. In the same way, Hell became a popular night spot.[3]

Creation of Man

Yahweh reportedly created the first humans from the very dust of the Earth, but they were often tempted and led into sin by beings claiming to be Satan, who may or may not be Mephisto, or any number of other Hell-Lords.[citation needed]

The Flood

Allegedly, when God looked down at the Earth and saw the wickedness of man, he caused the Flood. Once the Flood went away, he put a rainbow in the sky as a promise to the survivors who survived in Noah's ark that he would never again smite every living thing on the planet.

Since humanity didn't change, God decided to intervene, and thus the Spirits of Vengeance were born: a vestige of God's own power, bonded to human hosts. Those Spirits were placed into the care and overseeing of Zadkiel.[26]

Ancient History

When God asked that all first born children of Egypt to be killed, the Asura were dispatched to carry out this task.[27]

Man's religious texts, starting with the Old Testament and the Vedas were believed to be divinely inspired, a claim Yahweh rejected, stating that he didn't write "that badly."

God had a psychotic episode in Galilee due to the interaction between the dilithium that he was taking to control his tripolar disorder and antidepressants. This incident seemingly resulted in the impregnation of Mary of Nazareth with Jesus. Yahweh eventually married Mary, and stayed together with her for centuries. After almost two millennia of life together, his wife left him due to his drinking and possibly due to the age difference as well.[3]

Modern Day

Since 1938[14] and due to the actions of Adolf Hitler, God started drinking[19] at bender-level, going at Job's Place in Hell. He suffered from a tripolar disorder causing his appearance as the Triune: God, Jesus and the Holy Spirit. He also sometimes went trolling for virgins. During that time, he didn't speak to anybody.[14]

Deuteronomy

After helping defeat Deuteronomy, an angel/demon hybrid destined to replace God, Howard the Duck ended up in Hell. He was led by Cherub Thrasher to Job's Place where God waited for him to give his thanks. He also revealed that he didn't inspire the writing of the sacred texts (the Old Testament, the New Testament, the Qu'ran, the Vedas or the equivalent of a divine book in Duckworld), and that he was working on a screenplay.[3]

Heaven's on Fire

The fallen angel Zadkiel eventually managed to amass enough power to conquer Heaven and usurp Yahweh's place as the ruler of creation.[28] Eventually, the Ghost Riders were able to stop Zadkiel, and then repelled the demonic horde of Kid Blackheart, securing the Holy City. Yahweh took back control of Heaven, and thanked Johnny Blaze via his wife Roxanne, but Blaze angrily stated that God would have to fight his own battles in the future. Zadkiel ended up in Hell, in the hands of Lucifer.[29]

Attributes

Powers

God was stated to be all-powerful[27][3] and all-knowing.[3]

He was allegedly able to conjure a flood and to generate a rainbow.[26] He also presumably wielded powers similar and/or on par to those which Zadkiel acquired when he sat on the Throne of Heaven.

He could also cast illusions, notably to induce "revelations."[3]

Abilities

Allegedly, Yahweh has some skills in computers, as he stated he was still trying to learn his project management software.[3]

Weaknesses

  • God seemingly has a drinking problem[3] since 1938[14] due to what happened with Hitler,[19] and has been aggressive while drunk.[14][3]
  • Mental and Psychological Issues:
    • Tripolar Disorder: God suffers from a tripolar disorder, which makes him appear under the form of the Triune: God, Jesus and the Holy Spirit,[14] He has also had anger tantrums. He treated his disorder using dilithium.[3]
    • Depression (possibly): God seemingly suffers from depression since he takes antidepressants, which caused him to suffer a psychotic episode in interaction with dilithium.[3]
    • Sociopathy (possibly): Yahweh considers himself to possibly be a sociopath.[3]
    • Insecurity: Yahweh has stated he was so insecure he needed constant praise to keep his wrath at bay.[3]

Paraphernalia

Equipment

  • Dilithium, which is supposed to counterbalance his tripolar disorder.[3]
  • Antidepressants.[3]

Notes

  • It has been hinted that Yahweh could be shaped depending on the belief of people: Muslim "Allah", Judeo-Christian "God", or even Papa Legba[11] of the Vodū gods.
  • Trans-Sabalians, seemingly Muslims, insisted on the separation between their God, and the one of the Americans,[30] the Judeo-Christian God,[31] while Ghost Rider Molek stated that the perceptions were shaped by faith, but that there was only one source of power for the Spirits of Vengeance (himself calling it Allah), while Caretaker Sara saw it in "God", and Ghost Rider Baron Skullfire would see Papa Legba[11] (of the Vodū).
  • God rejected to have divinely inspired either the Old Testament, New Testament, the Qu'ran, the Vedas or the divine book version of Duckworld, claiming that he didn't write that badly, stating that those were too much afflicted by internal contradiction, continuity errors and plot holes.[3] He also rejected the concept of religion, and get along better with unbelievers.[3]
  • God can make Ghost Riders.[29] The account that he created the Spirits of Vengeance after the Flood might be contested by the existence of a Ghost Rider in 1,000,000 BC.[32][33]
  • Allegedly, not even God can save a lost soul from damnation, as the Pit of Hell, always reclaimed its own.[34]
  • God has apparently attended gatherings of the Godheads.[24]

Trivia

  • God being a noun, God prefers to be called "Yah", short for Yahweh, feeling it has a positive ring and sort of a rock-and-roll feel.[3]
  • While exclaiming, Yahweh states "Me" instead of "God".[3]
  • Around 2,000 to 500 BC, God created Zoroastrianism as kind of his "little practical joke".[3]

See Also

Links and References

References

  1. 1.0 1.1 1.2 1.3 [[Marvel Zombies: The Book of Angels, Demons & Various Monstrosities 1; Demons' profile|[[Marvel Zombies: The Book of Angels, Demons & Various Monstrosities #1|Marvel Zombies: The Book of Angels, Demons & Various Monstrosities 1]]; Demons' profile]]
  2. 2.0 2.1 Marvel Zombies: The Book of Angels, Demons & Various Monstrosities #1 ; Angels' profile
  3. 3.00 3.01 3.02 3.03 3.04 3.05 3.06 3.07 3.08 3.09 3.10 3.11 3.12 3.13 3.14 3.15 3.16 3.17 3.18 3.19 3.20 3.21 3.22 3.23 3.24 3.25 3.26 3.27 3.28 3.29 Howard the Duck (Vol. 3) #6
  4. Tower of Shadows #4 ; Evil Is a Baaaaad Scene!
  5. Hellstorm: Prince of Lies #9
  6. Gambit (Vol. 3) #14
  7. Marvel Graphic Novel #20
  8. Namor the Sub-Mariner #62 ; Beware the Tides of March
  9. All-New Official Handbook of the Marvel Universe A to Z: Update #3 ; Annunaki's profile, Dagon's second paragraph
  10. Marvel Fanfare #52
  11. 11.0 11.1 11.2 Ghost Rider (Vol. 6) #31
  12. Spirits of Vengeance #4
  13. Runaways (Vol. 2) #16
  14. 14.0 14.1 14.2 14.3 14.4 14.5 14.6 Howard the Duck (Vol. 3) #5
  15. Avengers (Vol. 3) #27
  16. Ghost Rider (Vol. 6) #24
  17. Monsters Unleashed #2
  18. Chamber of Chills #4 ; The Demon from Beyond!
  19. 19.0 19.1 19.2 19.3 Howard the Duck (Vol. 3) #4
  20. Amazing Spider-Man (Vol. 4) #1.5
  21. 21.0 21.1 Ghost Riders: Heaven's on Fire #5
  22. Moon Knight (Vol. 5) #27
  23. Chamber of Chills #3
  24. 24.0 24.1 24.2 24.3 24.4 All-New Official Handbook of the Marvel Universe A to Z #3 ; Council of Godheads's profile
  25. Bible Tales for Young Folk #1
  26. 26.0 26.1 Ghost Rider (Vol. 6) #33
  27. 27.0 27.1 Ghost Rider (Vol. 6) #30
  28. Ghost Rider (Vol. 6) #1933
  29. 29.0 29.1 Ghost Riders: Heaven's on Fire #6
  30. Incredible Hulk #392
  31. X-Factor #76
  32. Marvel Legacy #1
  33. Avengers (Vol. 8) #7
  34. Ghost Rider (Vol. 5) #6
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